Like Unto A Leopard

The elderly woman with the walker wondered where her grandchild had got to.

The London Zoo was no place for a lost child.

She looked around desperately.

Suddenly she came face to face with a leopard.

And the leopard was not in a cage.

What the...?

The leopard attacked the elderly woman and using its claws and sharp teeth ripped the arm out of her sockets.

Needless to say, the elderly woman let go of her walker.

The leopard set upon the woman and tore her to pieces.

Then the leopard went after other people.

Screams and sounds of tearing and ripped limbs could be heard all across the zoo.

Blood and flesh were everywhere.

The zoo's maintenance crew would be facing a major clean-up duty.

                                          *        *        *

The young man with the keys to the cages had heard the screaming and dashed into the handicapped washroom and locked the door.

He could hear the screams of people being eaten outside the door.

He almost shit his pants.

But since there was a toilet close by, he didn't.

When the screaming and roaring seemed to be over, he waited an hour.

Then exited the washroom.

He suddenly looked at the leopard cage where he had put water through the door a couple of hours earlier.

Oh my God, he thought, he must have absentmindedly opened the cage and left the door open.

The young man sighed.

It looked like his first day on the job would also be his last.

                                                *       *      *

"18 people were mauled and killed as a result of today's escaped leopard attacks at the London Zoo," the BBC's Naga Munchetty intoned, "Coming up on BBC News... the BBC World Business Report with the lead story being, will Apple re-name its OS X Leopard operating system desktops in the wake of today's attacks?  Sally will have the answer for you..."

"Oh my God," was atheistic Marxist Labour MP Magog Rhys Petley's only comment as he watched the BBC World News on the TV aboard the Boeing 787 (which would be recalled upon landing) as he flew across the Atlantic from Britain to America.

"I imagine there will now be calls for stricter leopard control in Britain," piped up the member of the U.S. National Rifle Association who was sitting next to Magog Rhys Petley aboard the plane, "which in my opinion is silly. After all, leopards don't kill people. People kill people."

To be continued.