Zombie Christ Nativity Scene

Zombie Christ Nativity Scene


Cardinal JM was contemplating a lawsuit as he stared at the Nativity scene on his desk.


It was his own personally designed Nativity scene that he had made back in 2012- when he thought the pagan gods of the ancient world would be returning to Earth.


Unfortunately a Russian nuclear submarine with a laser death ray had vapourized and disintegrated the returning space ships of Osiris and Quetzalcoatl with their deity occupants back on December 21st 2012.


Then back on Halloween night last year, the great scientific genius Dr. Cadbury Rocher had managed to reassemble the particles of Osiris and Quetzalcoatl and put them back together again.

Dr. Rocher did this work clandestinely since most of the time Dr. Rocher was employed by Set Enterprises owned by the billionaire ancient Egyptian vampire Set (and Set probably wouldn't be too pleased by having his brother, brother-in-law and rival Osiris reassembled yet again).


But getting back to his beloved Nativity scene, Cardinal JM wiped a tear from his eye, he had made back in 2012 a fierce looking Zombie Christ Child with fangs visited by 3 zombie wise men.

And he had just discovered that a couple in Ohio in the U.S. had been displaying a larger sized Nativity scene (with the exact same theme as his) on their property the past couple of Christmasses.


What use was it being a great artist and thinker if other people swiped your  ideas?

Cardinal JM wiped another tear from his eye.


He helped himself to some human fingers from his appetizer bowl as he gazed lovingly at the Zombie Christ Child.

He blew his nose into his handkerchief and wiped away a few more tears.


He went over to his prized collection of The Collected  Writings of Cardinal Walter Kasper on his mantelpiece.

Pope Francis had said reading Cardinal Kasper was like "doing theology on one's knees".

Vampire hunter Dracul Van Helsing had added, "Yes while vomiting into the toilet."

Van Helsing and Pope Francis held widely contrasting views on Cardinal Kasper's theology.


Cardinal JM looked at his watch.


It was time to join his private secretary Father Oliver Thomas Wardenclyffe in prayers to Hecate the Greek goddess of witchcraft in their private chapel to her.


They would ask Hecate for her witchcraft blessing on the coming Papal Year of Mercy.


-A vampire novel chapter
 written by Christopher
 Wednesday December 9th
 2015.


Sent from my iPhone