Donald Trump Meets Pan Goatee

Donald Trump Meets Pan Goatee

"What's an ugly looking woman doing in my dressing room?" Donald Trump screamed prior to doing a TV interview, "I didn't ask for an ugly looking woman in my dressing room. If it was a beautiful looking woman, I wouldn't have a problem. Beautiful is good. But what the Hell is an ugly looking woman doing in my dressing room?  I shouldn't have to face someone who looks like Hillary until the campaign after Labour Day."


Pan Goatee astral projects from the back rooms of The Dionysus Tavern where he had been sampling some of the god Dionysus' wine.


"Sounds like I heard the call of a red spider monkey fur toupee in distress," Pan Goatee shouted.


Then he turned and saw what it was that Donald Trump saw, "Egad! Is this a blemish on humanity I see before me? Come! Let me cut thy head off. God. That was easy. I'm glad I didn't have the same problems that MacBeth did in his nocturnal visions of daggers when he was contemplating bumping off Duncan. Duncan probably wasn't ugly and that's why those weapons of the night created such existential angst for MacBeth as a result."


Trump opened the dressing room door and screamed, "This ugly looking creature is now bleeding out of more places than Megyn Kelly. Would someone get the janitor or cleaning woman... and preferably a good looking one at that to come in and clean this place up."

Pan Goatee kicked the head with the accompanying ugly face far down the hall.

"At least that's now out of your hair," Pan Goatee said.

Trump turned to the full length mirror he had requested for his dressing room and used a banana shaped comb to comb his hair.

"Thanks for your help," Trump turned to thank the satyr serial killer for his assistance but Pan Goatee had already astral projected to a movie theatre to watch the new movie Gods of Egypt.




"Who was that goat-legged man?" Trump's question echoed through the dressing room.


In the distance could be heard an echo saying, "Heigh-Ho machete away."


While the William Tell Overture played in the background.


-A vampire novel chapter
  written by Christopher
  Wednesday March 9th
   2016.