Saturday, April 9, 2016

Renfield's Preferred Political System and Lobster Dreams of Perry Mason

Renfield's Preferred Political System and Lobster Dreams of Perry Mason

"Say, Renfield," Amadeus asked his friend as he flipped through a Political Science textbook, "in your opinion, what's the best political system and form of government?".


"An absolute monarchy with myself as absolute monarch," Renfield replied.


Meanwhile down in his lobster tank at the Set Enterprises laboratory, Michelangelo the Psychic Lobster was fast asleep.


He, along with his creator Dr. Cadbury Rocher, had been watching a grueling television marathon of old episodes of the Perry Mason TV show with Raymond Burr.


Now he was fast asleep in his aquarium while Cadbury Rocher was in his even more secret lab (unknown to all at Set Enterprises) working on what he considered his master creation- a genetically created replica of the winged horse Pegasus.


In Michelangelo's dream, he was dreaming of an old black and white episode of Perry Mason with Raymond Burr that was never shown on television because it was considered too hot for the America of the late 1950s to handle.


The name of the episode was Perry Mason Solves The Case of The Tomatoed Buns.

Special guest star for the episode was Sherlock Holmes' twin sister- the quite literally immortal (as in never dying due to eating immortal life giving Supernatural mushrooms) leather skirted dominatrix Sherrielock Holmes.




This was the courtroom scene from that episode that Michelangelo dreamed:


Perry Mason: Now Miss Holmes, when we use the term "tomatoed buns", I take it we're not talking about a certain food item we can select down at our local neighbourhood smorgasbord buffet, are we?


Miss Holmes (raising one of her black silk nylon legs on the witness stand and adjusting both her skirt and one of her spiked stiletto high heeled shoes): Indeed, Mr. Mason, we are not.


A large crack suddenly appeared on the glass of Michelangelo's aquarium as the lobster started hyperventilating under water over this dream sequence.


-A vampire novel chapter
  written by Christopher
  Friday April 8th
  2016.

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