Gruesome Murder In East London

Inspector Depp of Scotland Yard had been called to the scene of an extremely brutal murder at an apartment building in East London.

The body was the most dismembered that Inspector Depp had ever recalled seeing.

"It's going to take one Hell of a jigsaw puzzle expert in the forensic examiner's office to put this body back together, Guv'nor," Constable MacIntosh remarked to Inspector Depp.

"It looks that way," Inspector Depp agreed.

"Darcy was such a nice boy," the voice of the apartment building's landlady could be heard sobbing in the hallway, "he was gay so some people picked on him. But he was a nice boy nonetheless."

"You're pretty sure that this is Darcy?" Inspector Depp looked through the open door to the hallway and then around the room at the various pieces of "Darcy" spread all over the place.

"Darcy came home late last night with another gent," the landlady sobbed, "I noticed them come in while looking through my window overlooking the street.  Two hours later, the gent left. So it couldn't have been him whose pieces these are. And only Darcy and myself have a key to this room."

"You say he came home late last night?" Inspector Depp asked, "Do you know where from?".

"Darcy was a doorman at the Club Spandex," the landlady continued to drown the hallway floor with her tears, "he was pretty excited about an American rock band that was playing there- Nero Wilson and The Cleveland Cleavers. He mentioned that the band had only recently acquired a new member- someone who played the pan pipes by the name of Pan Goatee."

"Take Mrs. Woodward down to the Yard," Inspector Depp instructed Constable MacIntosh, "get her to talk to our sketch artist and see if we can get a picture of what the gent looked like who Darcy came home with."

Constable MacIntosh did as he was instructed.

Inspector Depp sighed.

Somehow this dismemberment reminded him of the dismemberments that had been taking place up in northern England by some deranged serial killer up there.

The full details of the gruesome crimes had not been released to the press.

That seemed to rule out a copycat killer.

So it was possible that the serial killer in northern England had now come down to London to feed his murderous passion.

From detailed forensic analysis of those crime scenes, it sounded like the murderer had slept with all of his victims- both male and female- before killing them.

So whoever this maniac was, Inspector Depp lit a cigarette, he was obviously bisexual or as that old American country music song put it, "This door swings both ways..."

To be continued.