Nathan De Burgh Polar Bear Private Eye In Toronto

Nathan De Burgh was in the Big "T"
looking for parking that was free
so he drove on to the 404
left his car and shut the door
walked right past the traffic jam
stopped at Denny's for their Grand Slam.


He was searching for the Big Cheese
that and a jug of antifreeze
for it seemed colder in the Big T.O.
(no need to worry about B.O.)
than it was at the North Pole
with Santa's many bags of coal.


Walking along the shores of Lake Ontario
he met a transvestite fairy-o
who fancied himself a Pharaoh
what a drag
of an Egyptian hag
Enough to make Nathan gag.

Then Nathan saw the CN Tower
where CBC bores the Canadian nation
with their dull old News Hour
and after buying pancake flour
Nathan poured on his pedal power
and roller skated on to the 404
just as traffic started moving
past his door.

A honk behind him
Nathan gave the finger
and then hit the pedal
shouting "Kiss my ringer!".

And such was Nathan's visit to Toronto
his next stop?
New Delhi or the Congo?


The End.