Surprise Guest On The North Sea

A cold freezing night on the Norwegian coast of the North Sea in January.

So what was Svend doing standing on the rocks casting a fishing rod into the surging tide?

Svend himself wasn't sure. His Internet had gone down earlier tonight and deprived without the comforts of modern technology, he was looking for something exciting to do.

He missed visiting chat rooms with Swedish blondes on line.

So since he couldn't do something with one rod tonight, he thought he'd do something with another.

As Svend threw his rod into the surging pounding tide again, there was suddenly silence.

Pure silence.

Total silence.

The waves had stopped pounding towards the shore.

The tide was moving out again.

Which was strange.

According to the almanac, low tide was several hours away.

He watched the tide go out.

He heard (if heard is the right expression to use) the deadly silence.

All was quiet.

It seemed the ocean was gone.

Was this one of the hallmarks of a coming tsunami?, Svend wondered.

He now wished he had spent more time watching news coverage of the Indian Ocean tsunami when it had struck back in December 2004 and less time watching Swedish porno movies on the Net.

Then he heard the loud thump.

THUMP.

What the-?

Silence again.

THUMP.

It was like that sound effect in scary movies which was generally created by having the beat of the human heart magnified several times- a terrifying sound.

Silence.

Then again...

THUMP.

The water of the ocean slowly parted as if Charlton Heston as Moses was waving a wand.

Silence.

Then the ocean came together once more.

Still silence.

All was calm.

All was bright.

On this silent night.

Svend looked around for signs of "Round yon Virgin Mother and child..."

... when the Kraken suddenly came up out of the water and grabbed Svend hoisting him in one of its tentacles.

Svend knew it was a Kraken because his next door neighbour kid had once drawn a picture of the gargantuan mythological creature of medieval Norwegian and Icelandic folklore.

The Kraken fed on Svend's limbs first as he screamed mercilessly on this no-longer so silent night.

Svend still swung from its tentacles as the Kraken delicately nibbled on what remained of Svend.

Like a gourmet culinary connoisseur feeding on calamari.

As the now bleeding rump of Svend (now deprived of arms and legs) was about to lose its head while swinging from the Kraken's tentacles, on the radio that Svend had left on in his empty cabin that old Duke Ellington melody played on the radio as a husky beautiful young voiced female jazz singer sang the lyrics, "It don't mean a thing if it ain't got that swing..."

To be continued.