Herr Hans' Twilight Stroll

Herr Hans stepped out of the church into the twilight.

The priest and theologian who had been attending a meeting down the street thought he'd pop in and see what this church was like.

The church had crucifixes and crosses and statues and paintings of the Saints.

The priest felt very uncomfortable and left the church.

Hadn't this congregation ever heard of the spirit of Vatican II? the priest wondered bitterly.

"Evening, Father," a grizzled old man greeted him.

"What the f---?" Herr Hans wondered. How did this man know he was a priest?

Herr Hans lifted his hand to his collar. Oh, he was wearing his clerical collar tonight.

He knew the news media would be there at the meeting so he thought he'd better wear his clerical collar just to impress folks.

"Were you attending Mass for the Feast of the Assumption?" the old man asked.

Herr Hans looked at his watch. Today's date was August 15th. The Feast of the Assumption. This was the date the Catholic Church believed that when the Virgin Mary died, she was assumed body and soul into heaven.

He hadn't paid any attention to that date in years.

"No," Herr Hans answered truthfully.

"Are you one of these priests who don't believe in the Assumption?" the grizzled old man asked.

"That's right," Herr Hans nodded.

"Can I ask you something?" the grizzled old man asked, "You know how churches all over Europe and Asia claim they possess certain bodily relics of various Saints like John the Baptist, Saint Paul, Saint Andrew etc?".

"Yes," Herr Hans was starting to feel noxious.

"How come in the entire long history of Christianity," the old man asked, "no Church has ever claimed to possess a bodily relic of the Blessed Virgin?".

Herr Hans looked at the man-shocked.

He could see what the grizzled old man was getting at.

Herr Hans ran down the street to avoid the man.

He would be late for his meeting with the Vampiress Isis anyways.

When he got to her apartment, photographers were taking her picture.

She was dressed in an exquisite black velvet dress. On her head was an exquisite diamond tiara of a crescent moon. Her spiked stiletto heels were likewise emblazoned with diamonds. Diamonds that were made up to look like six stars- one set on each shoe.

To be continued.